Grams Corner
For the Older Teen/Young Adult

I would like to welcome you to Grams Corner for the Older Teen/Young Adult and introduce myself to all of you young ladies. I am Grams; I have four girls all grown with families of their own. People tell me that I do not look old enough to have one grandchild but I have 5 and one arriving sometime in August.

I would like to create an informal atmosphere where you may ask questions if you would like. Don't be afraid to ask questions I will never think of them as being dumb. We are all at different levels of learning and that is how we learn.

Many of you are dating with some of you heading into serious relationships and commitments and a few of you are newly weds and preparing to have families of your own. You are going through a lot of emotional feelings along with your hormones still trying to settle down. I thought I would give you a brief list of traditions I did with my girls to give you something to think about.

When I began having children, I began thinking about the things children say and do about what they see around them. I made some decisions that would help me teach my children modesty, what was expected of them at certain ages, and so on. This is a list of what I decided to do.

1.   Modest Dress: Once they began walking and walking well, hemlines were at least knee length, and tops always had sleeves of some length.

I was not raised LDS and grew up in a large city where there were a lot of choices available. Both good and bad. Modesty was not always a popular choice. I wanted my girls to always dress so when the time came they would have clothes that were temple ready and not have to worry about a new wardrobe. They always had some type of sleeve on their tops and dresses from the day they were born.

Then there was the concern of skirt lengths. What’s modest for an infant is not modest for a toddler, and what’s modest for a toddler is not modest for a person 6 or older. I decided that while children are struggling to walk it’s okay for their hemlines to be a little short, they usually have dresses with matching pants underneath. This is because while they’re crawling they need to have their little knees free from clothing so that they don’t choke themselves or trip while trying to stand. Once they were walking really good then their hemlines came down to their knees or little below. By the time they were ready for Sunbeams their clothes were appropriately modest.

2.   Age 12: They would receive their first razor, first pair of nylons, and ears could be pierced. If they needed their razor before 12 they were given one.

Some girls may need to shave as early as 10 or 11. Some may need to wear a bra as early as 8 or 9 years old. I watched my girls for these signs. Two of them needed these very early while the other two were much older. Along with receiving their razor, at 12 they also received their first pair of nylons, and could have their ears pierced. This made them feel really grown-up without growing up too fast.

3.   Age 16: Make-up and Group Dating.

At 16 two more grown-up things happened. They could wear make-up and could attend their first high school dance with boys. These dates were only to be in groups. They were to date in groups until the age of 18. My girls preferred to stick with group dating even longer.

4.   Sleep-Over Birthday Parties only at ages: 8, 12, and 16 or 18.

Many families like to have birthday parties every year for their children. This can be an expense for some families. I had no problem with them inviting a special friend for cake and ice-cream, it was the full blown parties that were expensive. For my girls they would have big birthday parties at ages 8, 12, and 16 or Graduation. This cut down on the number of parties every year and also made their celebrations a bit more exciting. They could also have sleep-overs with these parties.

See you next time. Don't forget you can email me with questions at any time.

Grams