An Eternal Perspective

I have been having a really hard time with something. You see, there is a girl in my ward who is such a faker. She acts so sweet and innocent but she isn't. She acts like she wants a temple marriage, while she does things that would make you think the opposite like acting suggestive and going from boy to boy. She is even immoral. Like I said, she comes across like a fun and good person but she is very irresponsible, disrespectful and disobedient. So, all the guys in our ward think she's the greatest and since I can't flirt the only attention I get from them is when I do something stupid. They even talk about me. I am trying to be a good person and follow the prophet and I want good guys to like me more than anything. It really makes me think by looking at her that if I was that way I would be liked more. It's just really hard and so confusing. Please help me know that what I am trying to do is right.

~Kristina


Hi Kristina~

It sounds like you are doing exactly what you should be doing. The young men and women in the church have a huge responsibility in this respect. You have to be a good example to everyone around you, including siblings, classmates, etc. You are in a tough spot because you know what is going on with this girl, but I know how hard it can be to not be a tattle tale, especially when it is in someone’s best interest. Try to focus on yourself and knowing that you are doing what is right, and hopefully your example will rub off on her. Remember that this girl is responsible for her own actions, and she will be held accountable for them.

The boys will notice you. In fact, they may be noticing you now and you just don’t realize it! I know as well as anyone that as a teenager you think you have everything figured out. Boy, is it a kick in the pants when you wake up a few years from now and feel like you are starting over again! Just continue to follow the Prophet. Respect yourself and your morals and know that you will be blessed for your efforts.

It is such a blessing to be married in the temple. Strive for that. If that is your goal then do not settle for less, keep the eternal perspective. Someday the boys in your ward are going to be grown up and looking for a righteous girl such as yourself. Don’t lower your standards just to be “popular.” It isn’t worth it. I hope this girl in your ward will get her own priorities straight so that she will be able to have these same blessings. Thank goodness for repentance! One thing that I have to remind myself of on a daily basis is that Heavenly Father has a plan for us, whether or not thing are going the way WE would like them to! He knows each of us and knows what is best. Trust in Him. Stay on the path you’re on and I’m sure you will come across that boy in the right time.

When is it Right?

I’m just becoming a Christian and I’d like to know how and when the best time to join a church or home group is. I’d like to and I love reading and studying alone, but I am slightly apprehensive about going public. I feel I will be judged by others, even Christians. Is this a common fear when starting on the path to God? ~Kayleigh

Hi Kayleigh,

There isn’t necessarily a right answer to this question. The best time for you to join would most likely be different for someone else. The best thing you can do is to pray about it. Read the scripture in the Book of Mormon, Moroni 10:3-6. There is a wonderful promise made there.

You are not alone in this. I believe that everyone has these feelings at one time or another on their journey to our Heavenly Father. I was raised in the Christian faith but am a convert to the LDS Church. It took me a while to get up the courage to attend our meetings but I was so happy once I did. I was welcomed with open arms and everyone was very accepting and helpful.

There is a lot of support in our church, as there is in several others I have attended. Depending on your status in life there are activities for youth, single adults, married couples, etc. It is a great support system. Try not to feel as though you are being judged. Also, remember that those who are judging you will be held accountable for that. In the LDS church you will attend a ward or branch, depending on where you live. It’s a smaller group of friends and neighbors close to where you live and they will truly become family to you. Let me know if you need help finding out which ward you would attend.

Just be true to your faith and to yourself. Know that if and when you join a church that it is the right thing for YOU. Pray fervently and listen for the promptings of the Holy Ghost. You are on the right path with your scripture studies. Keep that up and seek answers from them. Good luck!