An Eternal Perspective

by The Evans Fam

I have been having a really hard time with something. You see, there is a girl in my ward who is such a faker. She acts so sweet and innocent but she isn’t. She acts like she wants a temple marriage, while she does things that would make you think the opposite like acting suggestive and going from boy to boy. She is even immoral. Like I said, she comes across like a fun and good person but she is very irresponsible, disrespectful and disobedient. So, all the guys in our ward think she’s the greatest and since I can’t flirt the only attention I get from them is when I do something stupid. They even talk about me. I am trying to be a good person and follow the prophet and I want good guys to like me more than anything. It really makes me think by looking at her that if I was that way I would be liked more. It’s just really hard and so confusing. Please help me know that what I am trying to do is right.


Hi Kristina~

It sounds like you are doing exactly what you should be doing. The young men and women in the church have a huge responsibility in this respect. You have to be a good example to everyone around you, including siblings, classmates, etc. You are in a tough spot because you know what is going on with this girl, but I know how hard it can be to not be a tattle tale, especially when it is in someone’s best interest. Try to focus on yourself and knowing that you are doing what is right, and hopefully your example will rub off on her. Remember that this girl is responsible for her own actions, and she will be held accountable for them.

The boys will notice you. In fact, they may be noticing you now and you just don’t realize it! I know as well as anyone that as a teenager you think you have everything figured out. Boy, is it a kick in the pants when you wake up a few years from now and feel like you are starting over again! Just continue to follow the Prophet. Respect yourself and your morals and know that you will be blessed for your efforts.

It is such a blessing to be married in the temple. Strive for that. If that is your goal then do not settle for less, keep the eternal perspective. Someday the boys in your ward are going to be grown up and looking for a righteous girl such as yourself. Don’t lower your standards just to be “popular.” It isn’t worth it. I hope this girl in your ward will get her own priorities straight so that she will be able to have these same blessings. Thank goodness for repentance! One thing that I have to remind myself of on a daily basis is that Heavenly Father has a plan for us, whether or not thing are going the way WE would like them to! He knows each of us and knows what is best. Trust in Him. Stay on the path you’re on and I’m sure you will come across that boy in the right time.

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